It Finally Hit Me

It is 6:30 in the morning on a Saturday. I didn't sleep very well last night. It all started yesterday.

At 3:00 my last class ended. Is went to my office to sort some odds and ends of papers, then get the heck out of there. Yesterday at 4:00 was the retirement celebration for school.

All year long I have been just floating through school. I have had great classes, great times, happy days. I was savoring my last year. Then today it hit me. All of a sudden it seemed so final. I had butterflies in my stomach. I started to panic. I didn't want to go to the party. I didn't want to deal with it. I didn't want it to end.

Well. I knew I had to go. I knew that many people were there to see me. Several people had travelled a long way for this event. A dear friend and retiree from several years ago came up from Kentucky. One of my former students, Mike, a great kid, from the class of '91, drove in from Detroit.

Ok. I did go. The party was a a country club near our school. The committee prepared a lovely evening. The food was good. The speeches poignant and only a little too long. There were many hugs. Everyone wished me well, asked me what I was going to do, and told me that I would be very happy.

Like I said, I didn't sleep very well last night. I guess it was a combination of being overtired, excited, and panicked--combined with thinking too much!

Well, now it is 6:45, and I am wide awake. I think I am going to research that Mediteranean cruise that I heard about. There is one that leaves Athens and heads to Barcelona via Tel Aviv and Messina that starts on the day that school starts in the fall. I can't think of a better way to spend my first day of the semester not being at school!